On breakups

This post is dedicated to @leslieaznglo.

Breakups are messy; I don't think there's much use in disputing that. Even the cleanest of breakups eventually result in some type of residual debris. Trust me. You might not see it right away, but unfortunately it's there, and in the saddest way possible, it's super hard to avoid. There are always things left unsaid, combined with the constant confusion and wondering going on in your head. And it doesn't help if your now separate lives are more intertwined than you'd prefer. It's a really awful thing to go through, but it's just part of the relationship ending.

I think the worst part of it all is the fact that there always seems to be more. Just when you think you've moved on, something triggers part of you that brings up unresolved feelings. When you think you're over it, you unexpectedly run into them and you may relapse. It definitely doesn't help when your friends remain friends with your ex, especially if they met because of your former relationship. They weren't even friends to begin with, right? Choosing sides may be a difficult task, but it's so important to be loyal to your friends. See how messy things can get?

Breakups can be rough, no matter how long the relationship lasted. They can get you down, and really affect your self esteem as well as future relationships. Despite all of this, we have to remember that there's always risk as we enter new relationships, searching for the right person, and that we can learn from our past ones. Breakups are messy, but so is life. This may be the optimist in me talking, but I truly believe that it'll all be worth it in the end.