On Valentine's Day

Before you start reading, I'd like to take this chance to say that even though I'm single, I have nothing against Valentine's Day. I actually like the holiday, a little less than last year, but nonetheless, I'm still a fan. These are simply the things I've observed over the years about it.

Not including the completely ignorant and oblivious, most know that tomorrow is Valentine's Day. This can mean one of many things. Those in a relationship, whether they've been together for many years or just starting out, are probably excited for a day filled with love and romance, or any given tradition they've started with their partner. And then there's the single people, a majority of whom hate this awful holiday.

Valentine's Day is stressful for everyone. Everybody seems to either be excited for the day to come, or the day to go. For those not in a relationship, this holiday can appear to be one, which divides people into haves and have-nots, and it sucks to be a have-not. It's rough going out into the world this time of the year, seeing stores decorated with flowers, chocolates, balloons, and stuffed animals. You can see the red and pink almost a mile away. For some, it's an unnecessary reminder that they are alone and they can't wait for this day to be over. It seems like those in a relationship can't stop talking about the holiday and this is a chance for them to flaunt their happiness to everyone else.

However, this day can be fun for single people who either enjoy being single, or may be going on a first date (which might lead to something more long-term) or to any sort of party. I can imagine it being fun getting together with other single friends and just having a good time, not letting Valentine's Day go to waste.

For many of those who are in relationships, Valentine's Day can't come soon enough and they get excited about what they have planned with their significant other. I have to admit that it's fun to get wrapped up in this "Hallmark Holiday"- buying cards, candy, and gifts. It's nice to have a day to remind each other how much you care about them, although I don't think we need a holiday as a reason to show affection- everyday should be special (but then again, I'm just like that).

Unfortunately, amidst all the fun and excitement, Valentine's Day could add a lot of pressure to a relationship. From all of the TV advertisements to the store decorations to talking with other people, the holiday can cause distress among individuals who wish to live up to their partner's expectations. What should I get them? Should I go all out and plan something extravagant? Should we just stay in and keep it simple? And as guys, most of the time it's up to us to make the plans and we would never want to let down our girlfriends. It's almost like we have to complete against all their other friends' boyfriends. I just think it's important for everyone to remember the true meaning of Valentine's Day, which is to acknowledge how you feel about your better half.

When I was younger, probably around middle school, I had a lot of friends that were girls and most were single like me. So, for Valentine's day, I would just give them all a rose and some candy- this day shouldn't be one that can only be enjoyed by those in relationships. I thought the gesture would make them smile and forget about being sad, and it felt nice to do it.

Last year for Valentine's Day, when I was in a relationship, I got my then girlfriend a dozen red roses and what I believed was a personal, thoughtful gift. I guess she loved it because she started crying- she was so happy and that made me happy too. This is where expectations start to make things difficult. I was expecting some sort of gift as well, but she didn't have anything for me, nothing at all. I was okay with that because I was just so excited to be with her on Valentine's Day, but I had this unsettling feeling in the back of my mind. Why didn't she get me anything? The weekend was still a ton of fun and she made me an enormous breakfast the next morning, probably as a response to my gift. Breakfast was amazing, yet I still wasn't fully satisfied. We have to learn to separate our expectations from reality.

This year's Valentine's Day, for me, will be very different than last year's. It will most likely consist of me cooking dinner at home, watching some TV, maybe doing some studying, or hanging out with some friends. Either way, I know it's going to be a good day because, as I have believed for a very long time, we shouldn't need a relationship or a romantic holiday to define our happiness.

On that note, I wish you all, no matter what you end up doing, a wonderful Valentine's Day.